how awkward are you on a scale from one to miranda cosgrove riding a candycane
(via sir-laughsalot)
When butterflies fall in love do they feel humans in their stomach?
(Source: -romanceisdead-, via conqueranddevour)
When someone comes into my room, and then leaves without closing the door again.
(Source: shesgotlooksthatkilll, via sir-laughsalot)
my life goal is to buy out an entire concert and then the artist will come on stage so dramatically and it will just be me sitting there like
(Source: tridant, via sir-laughsalot)
I played ten fingers this weekend.
“I have never ever……….. played a sport.”
“Does it count if it was against your will? Like some socially forward chick just comes up to you and kisses you as some form of greeting? Like, hey I do not even normally say hello to you and we do not talk or anything, but let me KISS YOU TO SAY HELLO. Her name was Jordyn. Without a question mark on the end.”
“One time I went and got a slurpee without telling my grandparents. It took me a couple of months to build up the courage.”
“One time I ran away from home on a bicycle and I got caught.”
Destini is confused. It hurt itself in confusion.
Hey I am going to be an electronica artist I play the Google homepage.
I was watching somebody’s video they made on the earth’s rotation for their science class, and then I read the comments. The introduction song was “Day and Night” by Kid Kudi, and then it showed a model of the earth rotating on a rod with a flashlight imitating the sun. There was a voice over explaining what was happening.
Comments:
”Day n night the lonely, wayt wtf, how’d i get here. SKREW SCIENCE”
”Soon this info will be like the world was once flat,”
What’s up?
Eight minutes have passed. Nine. “What’s up?” What is up. What is above me. The ceiling is above me. Above that is the roof and the sky and the atmosphere and outer space and there is air in between. There are chemicals in the air. There is hair on my head; is that above me? I know that is not what the person asking wanted to know, although it is what they were literally asking. For years, upon being asked this question, I have simply looked up, and answered with whatever happens to be directly above me. This habit has earned me more acquaintances than friends. Except this time it is online, and my humorously dry and snarky response loses much of its impact when read without stage directions. What are they actually asking me? Do they even know what they are actually asking me? How am I supposed to respond? Nothing. I have heard it responded to with “nothing” in the past. Is that true? There are definitely something’s above me. That would be lying. What is happening in my life? Is that equivalent? If I say “nothing;” that would be lying. “I am doing mundane tasks.” That is true. Is that what you are asking for? What am I doing? How much do you want to know? “I am feeling somewhat content, despite feelings of despair that have been present in the last couple of weeks, and I am completing mundane tasks, slowly, until I finish them, so that I no longer have to think about them, and I can sleep.” I get the feeling that you do not really care to know that much about me. I do not really know you that well. I think if I answered your question literally you would think it sophomoric of me. I think if I answered your question as a inquiry of my personal well-being you would think me psychotic. What are you asking? 27 minutes have passed. Do you actually even want to talk with me? Do I even really want to talk to you? Do I want to speak with somebody who does not even care so much as to formulate a conversation with the intention of a sensible answer? If you grunted at me and I made a high-pitched sound in response, would you be receiving a more meaningful response than you asking me “What’s up?” and me responding “nothing,” or you sneezing, and me saying “bless you,” or you working at a grocery store and asking me “How are you?” because that phrase has been ingrained into your mind as the proper response to me putting my groceries onto the black rotating belt in the check out. 34 minutes have passed. The next time I go to the grocery store I hope the cashier tells me I smell like a neglected fish tank and that my hair would be better suited as the stuffing of a scarecrow.
What’s up?
Dude #2: “Uh…” (what he managed to get out before Dude #1 was already too far away to hear the rest of what he was going to say)
-Urban Dictionary
